Bean Nighe is a fairy who is found across the Highlands and Islands of Scotland.  On the Isle of Tiree, where I live, she is often seen, by those who have eyes to see her, washing garments in the burn.  If she lays her eyes on you, your imminent death is certain.  If, however, you grab her unawares, and suckle from her long breasts, she will grant you three boons.

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What boons would you ask for?

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My name is Rachel Gwilym.  The story of the Bean Nighe has helped me to think about loss and death safely and creatively. 

 

The Bean Nighe goes about the mundane task of washing clothes – in this she is like me, with an endless pile of laundry that having a busy family entails, so death becomes a little bit more mundane.

The Bean Nighe sneaks up on you and when she does, death is certain.  This motif reminds me that death is certain and that it can come upon me when I am least expecting it.  This invites me to be prepared.  In my own life, I have done this by writing an End Of Life Plan and, learning and using the Grief Recovery Method.  I can teach you how to do this too.

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If you are able to grab the Bean Nighe and suckle from her breast, she grants you three boons.  This encourages me that there are blessings to be discovered when I turn and face death.  I have been doing this in community through storytelling circles and the Tiree Death Cafe.

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In some parts of the Highlands and Islands of Scotland where this story is told, it is enough that you grab the Bean Nighe.  In Tiree, the story goes that you must suckle at her breast.  I prefer this version because the motif of the breast speaks of nourshment and succour.

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What noursishment is there to be had from embracing death in the midst of life?

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This is a question worthy of consideration and one that motivates the work I do through Bean Nighe.